We’ve all suffered from − or will eventually be victim to heartbreak. Whether it’s from our family, once-believed lover, studies, careers, or friends. I’ve heard multiple advises from others that heartbreak occurs due to the fact that we have kept those things a little too close to home: our heart. When those things wrap themselves and tie a knot around our hearts; only to disappoint and hurt us, it destroys us. We become a different person after that occurs. Sadness overtakes us and we are unable to return back to the way we once were, either until after a while of recovering, or sometimes never.
I want to share an example that many of us have probably heard of. When someone throws a plate on the ground and the plate breaks into pieces, you could pick up the pieces, arrange them, and try to glue them back together. But the fact of the matter is that it will never be the same. The person has already done enough damage to the plate that the cracks will still be there. This is similar to what heartbreak does to us. It leaves scars.
Our hearts are fragile, and are prone to being damaged. Our hearts are also capable of experiencing beautiful feelings [such as love and being at peace]. The Prophet ﷺ stated in a hadith:
“…There lies within the body a piece of flesh. If it is sound, the whole body is sound; and if it is corrupted, the whole body is corrupted. Verily this piece is the heart” [Bukhari & Muslim].
Allah (swt) also states in the Qur’an:
“O you who believe! take care of your souls; he who errs cannot hurt you when you are on the right way; to Allah is your return, of all (of you), so He will inform you of what you did.” [5:105]
As crazy as it sounds, I believe heartbreak is something that can be prevented. Protect yourself before you lose yourself over something so transient. That doesn’t mean don’t enjoy the blessings Allah has gifted you with. Love is something He has instilled within all of us. But take hold the love of your school, career, family, and relationships in your hands. Never in your heart, because that is when heartbreak occurs. If you keep what you love in your hands, if for some reason it leaves or isn’t part of your life anymore it’ll hurt, but it won’t shatter your whole being because you held them in your hands: a place where you could easily let go.
Allah might put something or someone in your path to test you. We should be careful before letting anything in easily without inspection and full understanding that it is part of the temporary Dunya. The feeling of love is not forbidden, but something you love so much can leave in a split second. Understanding that these things are temporary will make it easier. The ache that comes with heartbreak is just as temporary as the temporary world that caused it. We must understand that.
The arabic word for love “muhabbah”, comes from the root letters “hubb”, which means seed. This seed has been planted in all of our hearts and it’s up to us to nourish and water that seed so it grows into the type of love that we were created for, i.e. love for Allah (swt).
Learn to give your heart to Allah, and to just have eyes for the blessings He gives you. The only love you should keep in your heart is the love of Allah. He’ll never leave, only wants good for you, and will never disappoint. If you’re sincere, that love will manifest within you and become a light in your life. You’ll then experience ultimate happiness. Always, always, always ask Allah for His Love and the Love of those who Love Him, and the Love of every action that brings you closer to His Love.